Shaping a Tree, Raising a Child

“Start a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not turn from it” Proverbs 22:6

Japanese gardens provide a stunning visual experience as one walks through it and enjoys the setting. This photo was taken on 1 May 2007 as Pat and I walked through Seiryu-en Garden in the Nijo Castle in Kyoto Japan. We were attracted to the beautiful trees across the pond on the small island. They have been shaped so nicely. The view is very pleasing to the eyes.

To achieve this effect, gardeners prune and sculpture trees during the early growth periods. Shoots are guided around round wires. The twist and turns of the stems and branches of the young trees are supported until the trunks are stronger. In the end these trees are shaped to their natural inclinations and bents. 

On 25 Sep 2013, then Minister for Education, Heng Swee Keat articulated some core beliefs which have guided  Singapore's educational principles. 

• First, every child can learn, whatever his starting point. We can and must help them find success in learning.

• Second, every child is different - siblings, even twins, can have very different interests and strengths! Each child will therefore succeed in different ways. 

• Third, our children will need different attributes to succeed in the future, because the world will be different - just as it is dramatically different today from even a decade ago.”

The clever gardener can envision the potential beauty of each young sapling and guide its growth so that eventually each tree will be differently shaped yet become equally pleasing. In the same way, every child is different. 

Similarly, the wise teacher and parent will teach and guide children understanding their natural inclinations, their ‘bents’. They can recognise, support the desirable tendencies whilst smoothing the rough patches and shaping out the bad and undesirable attributes. 

The Bible teaches that every child should be given the chance to start right. How do we start the child right? By initiating them to the love of God, as emphatically stressed to us,

'And you must love the Lord your God with all heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. And you must commit yourself wholeheartedly to these commands that I give you today. Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up.' Deuteronomy 6:5-7 (NLT)

This is the sacred duty of every Christian parent. 

'Children are a gift from the the Lord; they are a reward from Him' Psalm 127:3

Unfortunately, in today's world, single parent families have become common place. While this is not optimal for the children who thrive best when both parents are present during their upbringing, the responsible single parent can still have great success in raising children. The key is the nurturing of bonds of love within the family; single or both parents present.

These same bonds of love can be found in the church. The church as a family also has a duty to help nurture young children where we learn to show love and learn to cooperate and make friends. Coincidentally today, my church Charis Methodist Church celebrated Loving Families Sunday, an initiative led by the Chinese Annual Conference of the Methodist Church in Singapore. At the end of the worship service the congregation recited the Family Life Pledge.

There is a song by Jack Hartmann entitled 'We are Family,' that expresses this aspiration.

We’re big 

We're small
We’re young
And we're old
We’re all different people living together with love.

We laugh
We play
We learn everyday
We’re all different people living together with love.
Together with love.

And we are family 

Living, playing together
Together – together

We are a family
Wherever We may go
We are a family
I can feel our love grow
I can feel love grow

We hug
We care
We help

And we share
We’re all different people living together with love.

We sing

We hope
We dream
and we grow
We’re all different people living together with love.
Together with love.

And we are a family
Living working
Together – together

We are a family 
Wherever we may go
We are a family
I can feel our love – grow
I can feel love grow

The family, the church and society can help children to start right. 

Lionel

Updated 1st published 21 May 2007

In the Palm of God’s Hand

Jade Dragon Snow Mountain

'Yet, O LORD, you are our Father. We are the clay, you are the potter; we are all the work of your hand.' Isaiah 64:8

We have seen those pictures by trick photography where the subject would stick out his palm and a miniature image of himself or others would be standing on the palm. That image does not impress me. It connotes control or lording over the other person. It makes the person standing on the palm look so small.

Instead there is an old Irish Blessing that goes like this: 

"May the roads rise to meet you,

May the wind be ever at your back,

May the sun shine warm upon your face,

The rain fall soft upon your fields,

And, until we meet again,

May God hold you in the palm of His hand".

I was particularly struck by the last phrase, 'May God hold you in the palm of His hand.' It is an endearing, refreshing feeling that God will care for us in such a way that he holds us in the palm of His hand.

There is also another imagery of God's hands upon us and that is the interaction of the Lord as the potter and we, the clay. The potter painstakingly moulds the clay into shape. The clay is at first nondescript without form or definition. Yet the potter already visualises the final product; using his hands moulds and defines the clay, smoothening and embellishing it; giving the clay shape and character.

For permanence and glaze, the product is not finished until it is fired inside a kiln. The Bible speaks often about a test of fire, wherein anything without value, will be eventually burnt. That which is intended to last for eternity will come out of the fire a finished product, brilliant and unique.

Once, I attended the Ministry of Education’s investiture for new school principals. The theme of the appointment ceremony was “Through Your Hands Passes The Future Of Our Nation”. This slogan encapsulates the vocational calling of teachers and educators. 

The first paragraph of the letter of appointment to these principals read, "In your charge are many lives in the making, each one different, every one important, all with hopes and dreams for the future. They depend on you to guide, mould and nurture them to become better individuals and useful citizens."

The hand of God shaping, guiding and comforting us is often spoken of in the Bible:

'You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.' Psalm 16:11

'My times are in Your hands;' Psalm 31:15a

'The Lord makes firm the steps of the one who delights in Him; though he may stumble he will not fall, for the Lord upholds him with His hands.' Psalm 37:23-24

'Where can I go from Your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go to the heavens you are there; if I make my bed in the depth you are there....even there Your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.' Psalm139:7,8 and 10

'So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am Your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.' Isaiah 41:10

'Behold, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands..' Isaiah 49:16a

'I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand.' John 10:28

'Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you,' 1 Peter 5:6

In 2008, Pat and I were at Li Jiang, Yunnan Province, China. All around the countryside, there is the surrounding presence of the beautiful, majestic Jade Dragon Snow Mountains with its ice-capped peak. The scenery is magnificent and the mountains make me recall the commanding presence of the Lord and Psalms 121. 

'I lift up mine eyes to the hills and I wonder from where comes my help? My help, it comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth. He will not let you stumble, He will not let you fall, the Lord is your keeper. The sun will not strike you by day nor the moon by night, the Lord will keep your life.' Psalm 121:1-2 and 6-7

The Irish Blessing wishes the best for us, everywhere we go, anywhere we wander, that God will keep a constant watch over us. 

And so may I wish that you will ever be found 'In the palm of God's hand.' 

Lionel

Updated 1st published 31 Dec 2008