Find Us Faithful

Pa & Ma
Originally uploaded by LeeFamily

On the 28 Jun 2009, Pat and her siblings, the Goh (Kao) family celebrated the lives of their late parents the Rev and Mrs James Kao by remembering the 20th anniversary of their deaths. Both had died of cancer within 6 months of each other in 1989.

Coming together in family worship, we reminisced about Pa and Ma; what we knew of them. Rev Kao was a Methodist Pastor for 40 years. In his career he was the pastor to many churches ranging from small village congregations in Malaysia to large urban churches in Singapore. He was known as a church builder, having raised funds and organised the development for at least 7 churches in Singapore, Malaysia and China. Mrs Kao was ever the dutiful pastor’s wife who cared for 7 children and ever the present companion at his side.

We talked of how both were so committed to the Lord and faithful in ministry. It was not easy to be a minister of the Gospel in the 1940s. My father and mum in law were sent to village churches that could ill afford the minister’s salary, much less feed seven children. Ma would relate how these churches pay Rev Kao in kind, mostly by giving them “kampong” chickens. But they soldier on, faithfully serving God. They were both prayer warriors, noted for spending the early morning and late night hours on their knees, praying. We recalled the many miracles surrounding them wherein God answered their prayers in the difficult circumstances of their lives and ministries.

Considering their testimonies, struggles and service, the advice by St Paul to young Timothy comes to mind 1 Tim 6:6-8 ‘A devout life does bring wealth, but it's the rich simplicity of being yourself before God. Since we entered the world penniless and will leave it penniless, if we have bread on the table and shoes on our feet, that's enough’.

They are fortunate, my in-laws. They found their calling early in life and lived lives of service, godliness and contentment. Ravi Zacharias states “We often find out too late in life that attaining a pursuit and finding fulfillment are not necessarily the same thing. It is surely possible to find meaning without extraordinary success. Many people do. But conversely immense success does not always bring meaning and fulfillment. Sometimes it takes a lifetime to recognise God’s calling.”

Richard of Chichester prayed.
‘may I know you more clearly,
love you more dearly,
follow you more nearly,
day by day.’

St Paul’s advice to Timothy in 1 Tim 6:11-12 ‘But you, Timothy, man of God: Run for your life from all this (that is the pursuit of wealth and worldliness). Pursue a righteous life—a life of wonder, faith, love, steadiness, courtesy. Run hard and fast in the faith. Seize the eternal life, the life you were called to, the life you so fervently embraced in the presence of so many witnesses.’

What should occupy our lives? Do we pursue wealth, happiness, popularity, acceptance? My guess is that the pursuit of godliness is the best path to follow. It was the path chosen by the Rev and Mrs James Kao. I hope that my life will be lived such that long after I am dead and gone, my children and grandchildren would one day sit in conversation and sift through our lives, Pat and I. My prayer is that they would have found that we’ve have kept our Christian faith and have made a difference for them and others. May they find us faithful.

“After all our hopes and dreams have come and gone
And our children sift through all we've left behind
May the clues that they discover and the memories they uncover
Become the light that leads them to the road we each must find

Oh may all who come behind us find us faithful
May the fire of our devotion light their way
May the footprints that we leave
Lead them to believe
And the lives we live inspire them to obey
Oh may all who come behind us find us faithful”
Lionel

Ref Ravi Zaccharias, “The Grand Weaver” Zondervan 2007

Begin The Journey With The End In Mind.

 

'Fight the good fight of faith. Take hold of eternal life to which you were called when you made your good confession before many witnesses.'  1 Tim 6:12

We bade farewell to Sim Hee Wan, a long time church friend. He fought a 2 year battle against pancreatic cancer. I can sense the difficulty our church had in bidding our farewell to Hee Wan. He was still a young father, leaving behind a young wife and two small children. At the wake and cremation, his wife and friends shared strong and stirring testimonies of being touched by a quiet, unassuming witness of a Christian who has the gift of encouraging others. 

In 1 Tim 6: 12, the Apostle Paul wrote

'Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called when you made your good confession in the presence of many witnesses.'

Although this verse is often quoted at many a funeral wake, Hee Wan had a special claim to this verse and it would do well to learn the lesson he was teaching us.

The last two years of Hee Wan’s journey and good fight was tough and difficult. He shared his thoughts of this journey once:- “My family took the 4 hours drive up Malaysia to attend the church camp. As expected the question from the back seat ever so often during the drive was "Are we there yet?" The journey really felt unending to my two children. I find myself asking God the same question. "Am I there yet?" 

It has been 6 months since I started on my chemo treatment. The good news first, the cancer marker count has gone down from the 600+ to 80+. The recent CT scan in May 2007 also showed a small shrinkage in size of the tumour. My doctor told me that the treatment is working for me. I would need to continue with my chemo for 2 more weeks, from 5 June, before he decides on the next course of action. Currently, my physical condition is quite good, hardly experiencing any pain, living quite a normal life, thank God! At this moment, I really don't know how long this journey is going to be. All I know is "He" is doing the driving, and me asking Him the same question over and over again. I believe in good time I will arrive!"

Well in the meantime, we will just have to do what St Paul said, "Whatever that is of good report, think of these things" 

Hee Wan showed me the secret of beginning a journey with the end in mind. Somewhere in his ‘fighting the good fight of faith,’ he learnt that life on earth is about transforming the soul and not about sustaining the body. We are always more preoccupied about our physical selves, more nurturing of our health than about being conscious of our souls.

Consider what Hee Wan wrote on 24 Sep 2007, "I want my life to fulfill God's purposes. In worship to Him through every act I make! In fellowship with His people by putting aside time for them. In having the mind of Christ to be more like Him. In serving His people to be a giver of strength, time and money and to teach people who do not know Christ by being a friend to them."

Psalms 1:2-3

'His delight is in the law of the Lord and on His law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruits in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does he prospers.'

describes a man who nurtured his soul properly under God. That man is like a tree planted by steams of water. No matter what the weather and storms of life, the roots go down into the water sources and bring up life. By doing so he becomes a man who is able to respond to the situations of life in ways that are good and right. He provides thoughts, feelings, actions, relationships and behaviours that are right and in agreement with truth, fulfilling God’s purposes.

He achieves meaning in life. That is what all of us want, meaning for all that we do all and all that we are. Work, rest, struggles, family, friendships, parenting, community, beliefs, contacts must find meaningful experiences and expressions. This is what the Apostle Paul meant when he said in 2 Tim 4:7 “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” 

Did Hee Wan’s journey end? On the 1st April 2008, when Hee Wan drew his last breath, he arrived at heaven’s doors. You see Hee Wan began his journey with the end in mind and death is not the end.

Lionel

Man Does Not Live On Bread Alone

James and John
Originally uploaded by Leefamily

James Gifford, my grandson is one month old today. We watched with much anxiety in the past month. How he dipped in weight the first three days and regained it by the end of the first week. How he learnt to suckle and get into the routine of feeding from his mother’s breasts. How he recognises his father’s face and studies the look, shape and form. How he uses his cries as a means of communicating his needs and wishes. By the end of the first month he has put on 1 kg in weight and grown 7 cm.

It is going to be a grandfather’s joy to watch James grow. God has given me a special gift of time; the sheer delight for being there to witness his first faltering steps, the forming of the first few intelligible words and then the chuckle and laughter of the simple joys of childhood. I pray everyday that God will protect James. Give him the strength and energy for his physical needs. While we watch anxiously for the clear evidence of growth and development, a more important dawning and shaping is taking place yet unseen, the shaping of character and spirituality.

“Man does not live on bread alone,” said Jesus in Matt 4:4. What does this mean? Co-incidentally, my dear brother, Robert Goh gave me a book this week for my 57th birthday. It is Dallas Willard’s ‘Renovation of the Heart.’ The first paragraph of the first chapter hits home as I contemplate James growing. “We live from our hearts. The part that drives and organizes our life is not the physical. You have a spirit within you and it has been formed. It has taken on a specific character. ..The spirit within us takes on whatever character it has from the experiences we have lived through and the choices we have made. That is what it means for it to be formed.”

To some extent, we can manage and guard the physical growth of our grandchild. We can ensure his feeding and provide a save and proper environment. James growing from strength to strength will become obvious to us. But another growth is taking place in the depths of James’ being, in his spirit, his will and his heart. That growth is much more difficult to influence.

Proverbs 4:23 warns us, “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” Is there any doubt which of the two is the more important? The Bible describes a inner existence that is a wellspring of life, the very source of all that is worth the living. I learnt that for James to live life abundantly and to experience the fullness of God’s gift of his destiny, James must nurture his heart. I pray to God that I can help. More than my help, James will require God’s help. He cannot live on bread alone.

Lionel

A Miracle Called James

James Rui-An Gifford

Baby James Gifford arrived on 7 Feb 2008 (1st Day of the Lunar New Year) at 6.58pm. He weighs 3 kilos and measures 51 cm long. He is a beautiful baby with lots of dark brown hair and a small handsome looking face. Debbie was very tired after a long day and we were too, waiting at home for news from John who was by her side.

All day long I was mulling over the birth of my first grand child; not knowing what we will receive. Parents and grandparents relied entirely on God’s grace. Awed by the miracle of birth and groping to find its meaning, the song “I believe” came to mind. There is line in the lyrics - “Every time I hear a new born baby cry, I believe”. 

I believe for every drop of rain that falls

A flower grows
I believe that somewhere in the darkest night
A candle glows
I believe for everyone who goes astray
Someone will come to show the way
I believe
I believe

I believe above the storm the smallest prayer
Will still be heard
I believe that someone in the great somewhere
Hears every word
Every time I hear a newborn baby cry
Or touch a leaf
Or see the sky
Then I know why
I believe
I believe

“What’s the nearest thing to proof that God exists?” David Frost, the famous TV interviewer asked Dr Billy Graham the evangelist once. “The birth of a baby,” Graham answered, “I watched my younger son being born. And the doctor that was delivering the baby looked up at me and he said, “How can anyone see this without realizing that there is a God?”

I was anticipating James throughout these 9 plus months of pregnancy the same way as I was anticipating his mother’s birth 28 years ago. Back then I was more naïve. I was more excited for my firstborn. Nevertheless, I felt the same anxiety and restlessness over the uncertainty of what will come. The same resignation that we can do nothing and that the gift we will receive is entirely up to God. Hardly a day passes without invoking God’s grace, mercy and provision for our family.

Kent Nerburn wrote in Simple Truth, “A child whether of your blood or someone else’s, whether healthy or ill, whether beautiful or misshapen, is one of life’s greatest miracles. It opens your world into a new sunlight and is a gift greater than a dream". Similarly, David the psalmist and king, contemplated, 

'Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous -- and how well I know it.' Psalm 139:14.

I am blessed to be a grandfather. We received a miracle called James. Praise God along with us.

Lionel

The Transition of a Good Life

Contemplation
Originally uploaded by Lees@Hollandia

Death is not a snuffing out of life; it is a transition into eternal life.

In the early morning of the 3 Sep 2007, my brother in law, Jimmy Goh died. A small malignant tumour in the lung had spread relentlessly over three years. It eventually spread to the brain. By God’s grace, in a coma, unaware of pain and other discomforts, he drew his last breath.

Jimmy was once a rotund, ruddy faced man. A man of sure faith who will not give up, the kind of faith that should God have willed it, he would be healed. All throughout his three years of struggle, he never gave up hope in the miracle of healing.

With every visitor to his bedside, he would always share the simple graces God has bestowed on him that day. There were many stories of his relationship with fellow patients almost always ending with the sharing of the Gospel of Jesus. His journey with God during his illness became a source of inspiration to visitors, many of whom were members of his cell group. They would later share of his optimism, his endearing friendship, his genuine love, his faithfulness to God, church and friends. Many spoke of his practical piety. Some shared that he always interpreted scripture in manner of attesting the goodness of God to him. He was a grateful fellow, testifying always to the faithfulness, grace and providence of God towards him and his family.

At some point in time, Jimmy must have discerned that it was not God's plan that he would receive a miracle healing. God must have gently alerted him that he would die soon. It did not break his faith. He did not intimate this to his family. If he had any complaints he probably admitted them quietly before God, never betraying his belief that God had his best interest at heart.

At the point of realisation that healing will not come, how does one interact with God and live the remainder of one's days? Frankly, I would not know how. All I know is that part of the Christian witness is to value the sanctity of life and the dignity of death.

As friends and relatives we may have to accompany these loved ones onwards in their journey. I greatly admire the pastors and priests who have been called ever so often to take on this journey with the dying.

One such person I found on the internet is Norman Ingram-Smith, who was Director of Saint Martin-in-the-Fields Social Service Unit from 1965 to 1985. He wrote an article, Facing Death.

"When companioning dying people I have always felt, at the moment of death, a going away rather than a snuffing out of life. The first time that I was asked to companion a dying person I spent a great deal of time preparing myself for what I then pictured to be a difficult matter. I thought about my attitude as I was to sit by his bed in that hospital ward. I rehearsed the words, both of my own and of scripture, that I would say to him as together we waited for him to be dead. In the event I found his bed in the ward, pulled up a chair and settled myself ‘to do this thing’ as I saw it. I was still young enough at the time to think that my greatest contribution to any situation was bound to be wrapped in words. I started on this dying man. Barely had I begun when his fleshless hand came from under the bedclothes and he said to me, ‘There’s no need to talk – just holding my hand will do.’ Not very many minutes later, still smiling, he slipped from his body which would now be pronounced as being dead and the essential ‘him’ had crossed, by dying, into whatever state there is for those for whom Jesus conquered death.”

Death is not the worst thing that can happen to us. After all, it is the spirit that gives life - the body is useless without it. Norman Ingram-Smith said, “Christians can only view life and death as parts of a single continuum. To see the process of dying as a sort of cut-off point is to deny the eternal life in which the body and blood of Christ are keeping us, which is the assertion at every communion service.”